Dreams. Goals. Resolutions.

New Years resolutions are a great way to keep yourself on track. A way of testing yourself and attempting to conquer your dreams.

Goals are necessary to be truly happy in life. Without them we become existential and unfulfilled. Everyone has goals and dreams, and no matter how crazy, ridiculous, or unreachable you think they are, you should always go for them!

I believe anything is possible and I've seen and experienced things that I thought were not possible.

So make a list and work at it. You have a year.

Here are a few of mine, in no particular order.

• Write 2 new screenplays
• Get "Ryan Reynolds" ripped
• Complete the first season of my web-series
• Sell a screenplay
• Consistently write my blogs
• Land a job in the Entertainment Industry
• Win a screenplay competition
• Continue relieving my debt
• Visit my family more often
• Play the dating game
• Run a marathon
• Fix up my poor car
• Do 5 things I've never done before (Bucket list)
• Attend a Raider game
• Be more open with my feelings and views
• Continue to follow my dreams

Put that last one on the bottom of your list and make sure to always keep it in mind.

Christmas with the Crazies

I had the opportunity to spend Christmas with my family this year or as I call them, The Crazies.

It's not everyday that you see my family all in the same room, in fact it's not anyday. Once a year I attempt to get everyone together for either Thanksgiving or Christmas.

This usually ends in diaster.

It seems to depend on me whether or not we will all be in the same room each year, because I live a couple hours away and don't get to visit much. It's always made me laugh that my family are all minutes away from each other, but they never care to be in the same room together. They need a reason to see each other during the holidays and that reason is usually me coming to town. I guess it makes sense as I see all of them the least and I never have a lot of time to spend, but it's never a stress-free day.

However, this year was about as good as it gets.

Here's what happened...

Dec. 24th
10:00pm - I begin the drive up to my hometown of Yucca Valley, CA.

Dec. 25th
12:30am - I arrive at my Grandmother/Sister's place and see my beautiful niece.

3:00am -  After a couple hours of mingling I hit the hay, but not before reading the first 20 pages of a screenplay I had to write coverage on. Yes, I worked a bit on Christmas.

7:00am - I get up, make coffee, and have some breakfast.

8:00am - My Grandma, Sis, and niece wake up and we open some presents. My little 1 1/2 year old niece got plenty of toys!

9:00am -  After playing with my niece, Phelonie is her name(don't get me started), for a bit I got ready to head over to my Mom's where we were all meeting to eat. I thought me and my Sis would head over early and help her with the cooking.

9:15am - I wait for my Sister to get ready.

9:30am - My dad asks me to pick him up and drive him to my Mom's. I say, "Sure, I'm just waiting for Sis."

10:00am - Still waiting for my Sis.

10:15am - My Mom calls asking me to pick up a few things from the store.

10:30am - Wait for Sis.

11:00am - Sis is still not ready! I decide to go to the store, pick up my Dad, and meet everyone at Mom's.

11:30am - Arrive at my Dad's. He's not ready!  He is however slightly drunk... at 11:30am. I realize why he wanted me to pick him up.

12:00pm - Wait for my Dad. Get annoyed.

12:30pm - Finally get him out the door.

12:45pm - Arrive at my Mom's. We're the first ones there. Food is ready.

1:00pm - Wait for people. Pick at food. Dad drinks more. Mom complains about Dad being drunk.

1:30pm - Sis, Grahams, and Gramps finally arrive. We eat! Food is yummy. I pour some champagne.

2:00pm - Eat and converse. Dad runs out of beer and drinks the rest of the champagne.

2:15pm - Mom gets ancy and wants people to leave. Grahams and Dad have a few nasty words.

2:30pm - We open more presents and eat more food. My stomach almost bursts.

3:00pm - Dad complains that there is no alcohol in the house.

3:15pm - Dad passes out. Mom is super ancy for people to leave. We play with Phelonie.

3:45pm - I help clean up and do some dishes.

4:30pm - We say our farewells. I take Dad home and head back to my Grandma/Sister's.

9:30pm - After some sleep and some good conversation with my Grahams, I hit the road.

Dec. 26th
12:30am - After 3 horrible hours of pouring rain and not being able to see which lane I'm in, I make it home.

Reflecting back, I realize that this was the tamest Christmas that we have ever had. Sure, Mom got a bit annoyed, Dad got a bit drunk, Gramps was a little grouchy, but all went well compared to Christmas' past. That day love filled the air. My family hasn't had much through the years, but one thing there was never a shortage of was love and I know that my niece, little Phelonie, felt the love that day. I think she has done something incredible, brought a little peace and new love to... The Crazies.

Worst December

Don't be fooled by the title of this post. My December has been a pleasant one and I hope to continue that through the new year.

It's aptly titled "Worst December" after a song of the same name by my favorite band, Sugarcult. The lead singer, Tim Pagnotta, wrote the lyrics and kept the song a secret for a long time. It's about a relationship that he was going through at the time and he was afraid of his girlfriend finding the pages and them having to confront their issues. I'm telling you this because I have faced somewhat the same dilemma in my blogging.

You see, I am a person who keeps walls up on my emotions. Maybe it's to keep people out, maybe to keep myself in. Maybe it's my way of not getting hurt again, or me not wanting to hurt others. It's something I've always struggled with, even amognst friends and family. I have lived a crazy life with a dysfunctional, yet loving, family. I've broken hearts and had mine crushed to pieces. I've done things I'm not proud of and witnessed things far worse. These are the secrets that I keep locked up for fear of judgement, sorrow, pity... but not anymore.

I started this blog with the intention to write what I felt, what I lived, my ups and downs. I wanted to entertain, inspire, and vent through my fingertips. However, everytime I sat down and thought of who might be reading or what they might think, I chickened out.

This will change in 2011.

I will post more often. I will talk about what I'm going through in my life, and I will not hold back. I will reveal secrets I've never told anyone and fears that I can barely tell myself. I will talk about my family, my friends, my relationships and probably piss people off along the way. This will mirror my real life, where I will be more honest and open to those around me.

Don't get me wrong, I love my life and I'm doing quite well right now. There will be plenty of funny, romantic, beautiful stories as well, but I will not leave the bad out.

I think back and realize that I would not change a thing in my past, for it has made me the great human being that I am today. However, I've changed the title of this blog because it hasn't been easy Growing Up Young.

JDY's Year in Review

If there's any one word that sums up 2009, it would have to be "change."

The first African American president, Barack Obama, took office while another famous African American, Tiger Woods, fell from his pedestal. The world said goodbye to a legend, Michael Jackson and hello to new insta-stars such as Octa-mom and Susan Boyle. At the begining of the year the recession hit full throttle causing thousands to lose their jobs and dozens of companies to go belly up. Then, things started to slow down and by the end of the year, hope reined again.

Personally 2009 will be a shift year for me as well. A year of abundant change that will, hopefully, lead to great things.

I started out the year in my overpriced, but very cozy, studio apartment. I was working for the mouse at Disneyland and generally enjoying life. Things were looking up.

Enter tidal wave of diaster!

First, I lost my full time, 8 year job at Disneyland and currently, NO ONE was hiring. This of course led to my pills not being paid... I'm still in debt. Then, after countless applications and with the lease on my beautiful apartment coming up, I packed up my things, threw them in storage, and hit the road.

I decided to take a vacation while figuring out the next step on this crazy rollercoaster ride called life. I ended up at my parents house for a couple of weeks where I spent most of the time working on a new screenplay. Applying for jobs online was not doing squat so I moved up to Los Angeles County with a friend and started the search. Shortly after I landed a job in retail, which now pays the bills.

That was in June, and the last 6 months have been very uphill for me. I think losing almost everything and spinning my world upside down made me realize what I really wanted and more importantly, what I had to do to get it. I have since been working rigorously on my writing and even have a couple of film projects in the works. I have screenplays being sent out to all ends of the universe and I am working on other forms of story telling as well. On top of it all, I'm working out, staying healthy, and have a great positive vibe about 2010. Hope and health, two words you should not live without.

This year has been one hell of a ride, but it shows that sometimes a bad happening is really a blessing in disguise, or just the worlds way of implementing change. And let's face it, without change, this world would be a very boring place.

So cheers to a hopeful, happy, and healthy change in 2010.

Decembertime

The holidays are fast approaching and I'm still not completely in the spirit. Maybe it's because I've been hearing Christmas music and setting up decorations at my work for weeks already. Maybe it's because I'm currently writing a horror screenplay that's based around Valentines Day. I think mostly though, it's because I don't want to feel the sadness that I know is in store.

This will be another Christmas alone for me. Sure, I'll see my family, but that's a hassel in itself. I have a very loving, supportive family, but they sure are a bunch of loons. Christmas is not as fun as I'd like it to be and occasionally I have to become a moderator. I'll see my great friends at our annual Christmas party, which will be fantastic. However, most of my friends have a second half. I, on the other hand, do not. This is the lonely part.

Nobody wants to be in a relationship more, than during the holidays. It's a beautiful, magical time and you want to share it with that special someone. Some of the best times in my past relationships have been during the holidays. Unfortunately, when you have that big void in your heart, it can be a lonely season.

This will be the second holiday season in a row with no one to share with for me. I did make a decision about two years ago to not be very proactive with dating. I decided to work more on my own life, and frankly, was certain that I would never find anyone like my last girlfriend. Looking at things now, and after my experiences, I realize that there should always be a happy balance.

True, I'm very busy working on myself and my writing, but there's a problem. This leaves less time for friends, family, and dating. I think it's important not to focus to much on one thing, but focus intently on you and your life as a whole. Do the things you want to do, have fun, and work really hard. I've been mostly focused on the working really hard part and haven't had as much fun as I'd like. I will be attempting to juggle in 2010 and this, I think, will lead to great things.

As far as this holiday season, I can still hope that someone comes along and blows me away, but it's not needed. As a writer, a romantic, a loving person with a huge heart, I've found that sadness, depression, and lonliness don't have to be a bad thing. I'm not saying to go and wallow in your room forever, but accepting it has some benefits.

You can cuddle up on your couch or in your bed with some popcorn and watch those mushy chick flicks. I love doing this. It's theraputic in a way, and yes, i cry on occasion. A few of my favorites RomComs are; Serendipity, My Best Friend's Wedding, Only You, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and of course Sleepless in Seattle.

You can take in the beautiful lights, Christmas music and friendly people all around you. The holidays truely do bring the best out in people. Ice skating or taking a walk in the cold is fun too.

You can use your emotional rollar coaster to feed you inspiration. Don't let all those emotions bottle up! When I am depressed I love to sit down and write a sad scene in my screenplay. When I'm feeling lonely and wish that I was in love I write a romance scene. These scenes end up being some of the greatest I write because the emotion transfers to the page. If you're not a writer, use it for something you love, singing, photography, knitting, creating holiday cards. Doing what you love gives you a super high that will make you feel amazing.

This wonderful high feels this way because you were productive, doing something that you love, and you were able to release your emotions while doing it. It's a detox system for your soul. There really is no better feeling, except maybe falling in love. For us single folk though, I say, embrace the lonliness this season.

Happy Holidays!

Excuse me Mr. Phelps

Has anyone ever told you that you look like Michael Phelps? Yes... yes... yes... yes... yes... I must hear that question 10 times a day, but thank you.

I have never been told that I look like anyone so much in my life! . Four years ago I got it a little bit during the Athens olympics, but it was tolerable. Now it's everyday, all day. Whispers as people walk by, rubbernecking by passers-by, and that hideous question over and over.

Don't get me wrong, it's flattering, I even feel kind of like a star, but let's face it I'm not him and I don't have 8 gold medals, and I don't make millions... damn it!

I'm a struggling filmmaker that hopes that Mr. Phelps is cast in an action movie so that I can play his double. lol. Seriously.

Working in large crowds is fun though cause I feel like I should be signing autographs and taking pictures, which I actually do sometimes. I think I'll just start saying that he's my cousin and that I taught him how to swim. lol.

Michael Phelps look-alike out!

Another Day

Today was very peculiar for me. I woke up and had a text from my ex-girlfriend, who just broke up with me by the way, that said how much she misses me... akward much? I then walked to work because I live so friggin close, I love it! I just put my headphones on and escaped reality while taking in the cold air.

Music seems to run my life, without it I might truely go insane. I have a song for every person I know and every great, or not so great, moment in my life. Music talks to my soul and heals my inner wounds like nothing else in this world.

I get to work, which is Disneyland by the way, yes I work at the happiest friggin place on earth, and get my morning coffee. Yum! Then I go about my day and half way in, noon or so, I look up at a guest to say hello and it's friggin Mankind. You know the guy who used to wrestle in the WWF or WWE or whatever W-W it is now. He was pretty cool and very nice, but did not look like a wrestler anymore. What can I say, we all get old sometime. Well except me 'cause my last name's Young!

So I finish work and boogy on home to get my real work started. I'm currently writing a screenplay and plan on getting it sold when it's done... doesn't everyone. I however am side-tracked by a bunch of nonsense that is going on in the Young family. We are quite the dysfunctional brady bunch. Thank goodness I don't live with any family, on the other hand I miss them dearly. Well, I took care of the crazy train and moved to the computer when my ex begins to text me again.

We had dated for a year and I she was the most amazing thing ever. So... she dumps me and moves out. That was a week ago. Well now she starts sending all of these sappy text messages which I would totally dig under different circumstances, I'm pretty much a romantic, but now is not the time girl. You just broke my heart! It's like she is playing with me. I miss you, I love you, but... we're still breaking up. Huh? So, I tell her how I feel and she stops texting. I think I'm over the dating GAME for awhile.

After all of this i was hungry so I ate. Then I sat down to write, but not the screenplay, my blog. So here I am and there I go.